The weirdest boy in the world
Scuttles in the saloon door and puffs out his chest
He wants to show you the medals he's collected on his vest
No one is that impressed
After he shows you his collection
Upon further inspection, he's less of a young man
And more of an insect
Or an arachnid full of appendages
He says, "all the better to hug you with.
But I don't really like that, so I'd appreciate it if you didn't."
He put his legs up on the table and leaned back
Teetering on the edge and relaxed
I thought, "man, I really wish I could do that"
The extra arms are there to catch you when you fall back
A shitload of arms and a shitload of legs
A billion eyeballs and only one smile
Four stomachs because I'm a rumen
It's what it means to be human
to consume "what it means"
And obsessive dwell
As he crawls back to his cave on his excessive legs
After he's had his fill
The extra support means he makes it
The extra mile
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